I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
