Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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