When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
