you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
