you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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