Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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