No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Who died my cat blue again?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
