This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Randomize
