If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
