I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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