Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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