woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize