even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
