Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
How's work?
Spinning.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
