All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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