Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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