is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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