I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize