Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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