why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
They took my balls.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize