420 ftw
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
