I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
are you so shy because you have an std?
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize