Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it

(508): View more from Massachusetts

I dont have a dog?

(774): View more from Massachusetts

WTF

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(317): View more from Indiana

I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex

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(818): View more from California

Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.

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(903): View more from Texas

Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me

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(614): View more from Ohio

We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

I've fallen from my one moral pedestal

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(850): View more from Florida

Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.

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(310): View more from California

He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style

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(773): View more from Illinois

Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?

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