pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
she peed on how many people?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
