Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
