Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
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