my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
