Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Still dying that you shit outside
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize