And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
