He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka