She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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