i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
