why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
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