we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
