So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
