We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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