I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
