I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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