Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
