all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
