I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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