Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
