Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
