he thought i was a dude.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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