So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
