You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Randomize