ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
