I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
