i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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