Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I'm having to shit out rocks
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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