this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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